8 months later as a teacher and now 40?

I just celebrated my birthday a week or so ago, people have been asking me how is turning 40 hitting me, well all I can say GREAT!!! I feel that sometimes people are surprised to hear it, maybe I should say I am hating it? Well no because I am not, I am 40, happily married to my best friend for 20years, have 2 beautiful daughters and of course 2 cute dogs. Life is good !!!

Here I am on my couch looking back at my life, its been almost 8 months ago that I became a certified Bikram teacher. I started teaching the week I arrived from training and haven't stopped. I love saying to my hubby, I love my job and really it isn't a job but they are paying me to do something I love doing. Do I still get nervous teaching? Absolutely, my digestive system kicks in as soon as I walk into the studio but once I am in the Yoga Room that nervous energy changes to something more dynamic. I was lucky to have my studio owner Annette mentor me for the last 7 months, followed by Heidi our studio manager now giving me feedback each time she takes one of my classes. I take my teaching very serious, I read a posture everyday or sometimes the whole enchilada...hmm that sounds yummy!! I do, I still record and listen to my classes, I'm always working on improving my teaching, my dialogue. I have a vision of what kind of teacher I want to become but I am always reminded of a person that I sat next to the plane on my way home, what she told me touched me deeply and that was just to teach from the heart and fall in love with your students....thank you Judes!!

I visited Spring Teacher Training 2009 in Palm Springs, I believe it was week 7. It was an amazing experience and I am very happy that I went. I went with my studio owner Annette & Heidi, we took class with the 320 students and did some lectures, posture clinics, we did the whole thing, just like we were at training ourselves but this time we did some R&R, we enjoyed the pool and had a couple of drinks at the end of that week, we deserved and it felt great!! Everyone should go back, I remember saying to myself that would never go back but I did. I didn't get to see Bikram but I am hoping to catch him soon.

My last week & My first teaching class

What a journey it was, I have to start with my last week of training. They said it was going to be the easiest week, they had many surprises for us, maybe they were just saying that to us, to just keep us going or was it a mind game? Whatever it was, I was sure glad it was my last week. My body hurt more than ever but what kept me going was knowing that Richard/hubby was going to be arriving on Wednesday night.

I can not tell you the joy I had running up to him, I was shaking so badly and my heart was racing so fast, I needed his hug so badly. I felt bad for my yogi's, I knew that they wanted someone around for them too, they were so excited for me they even cried out of joy for me, that is how close we were with each other. Richard did all 4 classes that were left and to my surprised he stayed strong and never layed down. My teachers told me he was really pushing hard in class, that his postures were kicking some butt and they were right. He stayed connected with my through yoga, he completed total of 45 days while I was gone and lost probably 15lbs or more, not sure but he looks really good and I am very proud of him.

Many teachers told me that this experience would be life changing, but for me it reassured what I already knew, I have a wonderful husband who loves me with all his heart & wonderful daughters, my life and my world around is pretty darn good. I definitely appreciate my life more now than ever, I will try not to take things for granted, and things are just things but your life is more than anything anyone can give you, that is why this Yoga is what I do and practice.

Graduation was unbelievably surreal, I could not get over the fact that I finished this 9 week course, I made it!!!! Yes I did, it was tough but well worth the benefits, maybe I will miss it someday but I am sure glad to be home with my family, my support system. The good byes were hard, I may never see most of the people I met and hung out for 9 weeks but I am sure glad I got to meet them, I will always keep them dear to my heart. Someday I will travel the world and I will get to see many of them.


So what about my roommate, well most of you know I got married a year after high school and have never had a roommate other than my hubby. I actually was very lucky to get the best roommate ever, we did everything together. We both worked really hard to get our dialogue in, practiced as much as we could, never left the hotel till the very end, which we needed. Colleen pushed me to even take a couple of the Sunday classes, that were meant for people who forgot to sign in or missed lecture but if you were a die hard yogi, you were able to take the class too, and that she managed to get me to do. I love and adore this woman and as she likes to say my sister from another mister.. hmmm I think that is the New Yorker in her.

My first week home, yeah!! Feels so good to sleep in my own bed, yes I did have those dreams thinking I was still at the Fairmont Hotel and I also had those dreams where I am doing Wind Removing and I wake up with my legs up, weird I know.

I taught my first class last night, wow what a HIGH, it was so awesome being in front of all the students and teaching them what I have been hearing and practicing for 9 weeks. I was actually surprised that I was able to share a little bit of myself during Camel & the last Savasana, now I know what they mean to teach from the heart, what a rewarding feeling. Many thanks to my home studio, they have been so supportive from the day I walked into that studio, medicated with anti-depressants to not taking anything anymore, they supported me through my training and now my teaching. I can't thank them enough.

The last week in Acapulco

Well here it is the last week, the one I have been waiting for. Today I am super happy to know that I will be home very soon, yes I will probably miss this training but today I am just happy knowing that I will be home soon. 9 weeks is a long time to be away from your family, especially when you have been married for 19 years and never been away from your family more than a week.

So what happened last week, wow it was a very crazy week. We finished with our dialogue 2 weeks early and Bikram was back in action, kicking our butts at yoga with some late nights. He kept teasing us how he may give us a triple on Tuesday or Wednesday, he said we were strong and ready for it. So the days came and left and there we were Thursday and after our 5pm class they told us not to leave the room, then they started to bring his orange towel in and that's when we knew it was the day. With no preparation ahead, most of us had drank all of our water. He started with the pranayama breathing and when it came to the 2nd set we just said NO way, lets move on and we did. I tried very hard to stay positive and I did for all of the standing series, I was very proud of myself, my legs were shaking through most of it but I managed, by the time the floor series came, thats when I said OK, gotta go get me some water. For the first time, I knew it was ok to walk out and all I could say to myself is, ITS OK.. you have nothing to prove to anyone, just take care of yourself and I did. I can only imagine what it looked like to be in his shoes and see all the bodies running out of the room or dropping like flies, it was a mad house. Once class was over, then they annouce that lecture was still on, we were up till 2:30am that day, it was a very hard hard hard day for all of us.

The next day, I woke up feeling like a truck ran over me. Morning yoga was taught by an amazing visiting teacher from New York (Troy) he really tried to get us moving but we were all very sore or tired from the lack of sleep. I can tell you that I cried the whole standing series, I broke down so hard but I stayed in class and just tried to stay calm. I don't know what to expect this week and I don't even want to guess. Well its lecture time..gotta get ready

2 weeks left and Bikram returns

I can't believe that we have 2 weeks left, I am so excited to be coming home soon and be with my family again. I have missed them so much. My hubby Richard will be out here a few days before graduation and I am so excited to have him be here and share the experience with him. He also has a love for Bikram Yoga, I can't wait for him to practice yoga with all 300 of us in the Torture Chamber, it will be an amazing experience.

As I layed in bed the other day I realized that in 2 weeks I will be a certified Bikram teacher and that is a crazy feeling, I actually got teared up. I know that the real training and learning starts when I get home. The training has be intense, emotional but worth every penny of it, to be able to teach the yoga that changed my life is an amazing gift that no one can take away, I am honored to be able to teach it.

So 2 weeks left, Bikram is back in town again and I am sure he is gonna kick our butts in class. This time I think we are all ready, 7 weeks of 2times a day yoga, I think we are ready. Back to the late nights & lectures with Bikram. I am sure I will get cranky but I will just keep reminding myself 2 weeks left and less than that I will see my hubby.

Week 6 done!!

So week 6 is done and gone, another good week for me. What I mean about good is that I stayed focus and didn't break down. My week started with my group pressuring me to attend the Sunday 11am yoga, this is a class that is not mandatory, it is for make up classes or for die hard yogis. To my surprise my practice was probably one of my best here since arriving but the best gift was the reminder I got from it. It gave me back that feeling I have when I practice at home and why I am here. I was on cloud 9 that whole day.

My body actually hurt more this week by Thursday night I could not feel my body, as soon as I started Half Moon on Thursday my tears just ran down my face, the feeling I had was SHIT my body hurts so much but I am gonna make it through no matter what and I did like always. The morning yoga for most of us, is the hardest, as soon as we get to first set of Hands to Feet, you hear all the moaning in the yoga room, we kinda laugh about it during class.

It's unbelievable that we have only 3 weeks left, so much to still do. So far my Yoga dialogue has been going well. I still wonder if it is true that all this dialogue will be in my head when I get home. I really hope so, since I will start teaching as soon as I get home. I am very excited to getting right into it but at the same time and I am nervous.

We had Rajashree here for the whole week, what a week it was. For the most part she taught the morning classes followed by her lectures. She was very kind to us, the lectures where during the day, followed by evening posture clinics.

I am still stuck in the hotel but hopeful that by next weekend I will get out and see Acapulco, maybe even go see those cliff divers everyone talks about. 3 Weeks left and all though I will someday miss being here, I just can't wait to be home with my family and see how this whole training has changed my life.

Week 4 & 5

Wow week 5 over!!! Feels so good, even though I am so tired having to be over the hump feels really nice. Week 4 was probably my worst ever, they said it would come week 5 but it came early and I cried like a baby. I knew the training was going to break me in so many ways and so far it was proven to do that. The week started with Bikram teaching early in the week and leaving us hanging before camel, he was so upset that so many people were sitting out of postures, walking out of the room, he got so upset that he walked out on us and said class was over, we never got to Camel and believe me Camel is the best part of the yoga, people been suffering in the yoga room with cramping, throwing up, etc, but I don't think Bikram realized how bad the heat and humidity was. We had to meet Bikram for lecture that night and we all didn't know what to expect, we knew he was upset but to our surprise he decided to make some calls and they figured out that the yoga room was lacking oxygen and it was 97% humidity. Since then they have added many fans and opened some vents around the room, don't take me wrong the room is still HOT but it is finally a little better.



So what about week 5, well it was a good one for me. I just said to myself, your going to make it good and that's it!!! and it was a good one. Dialogue is going really fast, we are now starting # 17 Locust, my posture clinic feedback has been pretty good until COBRA.. I blanked out in the middle of it and added SHIT to the dialogue and I started laughing at myself, I got the students in and out the posture but the dialogue was all over the place. So now I am moving on and hoping that I will get back on track, I am still pretty nervous delivering my dialogue in front of the students, they say it will go away and I am waiting for that moment to come.

The days are flying by so fast, we go from AM yoga, lunch, posture clinic, PM yoga, quick dinner, posture clinic/lecture, then study till 2am or later, then it starts all over again. Oh and my latest perfume is TIGER BALM..yeah I pretty much put this all over and I don't really care how much it smells, it just feels really good on, and my favorite toy is my tennis ball, this baby helps with all of those sore spots I can't get too. Well I am off to get a massage by the beach, yeah I know it sounds rough, it is, really!!!

Week 3, sick like a baby

I was excited to get this week started, but I guess my body wasn't. My biggest fear came true on Monday,there I was 2nd row in the Yoga room and yeap the girlie thing happened and of course our towels are white, maybe I shouldn't be sharing this but its the way of life, I had to run out of class take care of my issue but coming back was so hard, once you get fresh air and try to get back to that wonderful Hot room, it's not easy. So let's just say that Monday was a really emotional day then to top it off I got a sore throat and was sick like a baby all week. I had to sit out during some of the postures, blowing your nose then trying to do some of the forward bends are not fun. Whatever I got and still have is going around and spreading like crazy. But even with all this happening we have to do our 2 yogas a day and now our posture clinics have started.

Bikram Yoga has 26 postures, so far we have completed 2 of them and are in the middle of Eagle, we have to do the dialogue verbatim with 3 bodies in front of us and about 30 plus people behind us watching and following our dialogue, then we get critique by visiting teachers & some senior teachers as well. Most of the time the feedback is pretty accurate, for me it has been pacing, I tend to go to fast being the Mexican that I am I tend to talk really fast. It's kinda funny when you are walking around the hotel and you see 300 plus people doing postures, practicing in group and talking to themselves, listening to Ipods.



I gotta tell you the lectures are definitely long and sometimes not very interesting but we have to sit through them and try to listen, its pretty hard to do when you sitting in the most uncomfortable chairs but somehow we manage to do it. One of the funniest moments this week is watching Bikram take his pants off on stage and show us his butt, yeap his butt.. I guess he thought he had a pimple on his ass then it turned out to be some blister or something, he kepted saying how uncomfortable he was and decided to drop his pants and show all of us, then he proceeded to clinch his butt and show us how deep breathing show be done, its was too funny.

So what about the drama this week, well last week we had some older gentlement from Polland storm off during yoga saying that our class was way too long (Emmy was teaching) and then basically wanted to punch out one of the teachers of course he was kicked out, then this week we one of the guys from England was kicked out, not sure why. People are starting to dissappear, not sure if for medical reasons but the rumors that go around are very interesting.

The training is definitely challenging but I am also having some fun, I haven't explored Acapulco yet but sometime in the future I will. We are getting sick of the food we eat here and of course the food that we are able to make in our rooms are limited but we are managing. My yoga practice is definitely crappy, one of the things that I heard from one of our teachers during class was "you are not here to improve on your postures, you are here to be great teachers" so with that said, I am going to enjoy what I can do for now with my yoga practice and be hopeful that my yoga practice will improve when I come home. If I can learn my dialogue and give back what was given to me, that will be more satifying than anything else.